Love.  It’s the single-most used word in our modern culture.  We all define it differently, and the world certainly claims it is based on emotions: passionate, exciting, and flowery.  If we don’t feel it, says the world, it’s not truly love.

As Catholics, we know that love is more than a fleeting feeling, however.  St. Teresa of Calcutta even said, “A living love hurts.  Jesus, to prove His love for us, died on the Cross.  The mother, to give to her child, has to suffer.  If you really love one another properly, there must be sacrifice.”

Not only is this an uncommon and unpopular perspective on the subject of love, but it is really distasteful to many if not most, of us.  Who wants to learn to love by giving up more of him/herself?  Or by relinquishing his/her time?  Yet it is precisely when we empty ourselves of selfishness and learn to love by way of the Cross that we understand, more fully and deeply, that love is far more than emotion—it is a decision.

Growing in love isn’t easy, and we all know that.  For love to be eternal, it must be based on one’s intention to give of oneself daily, even and especially when it hurts.  But only a love that is faithful worthy of the theological virtue of charity.  This Valentine’s Day, as you exchange your love notes, kisses, hugs, and chocolates, remember that your love extends far beyond your annual gestures of affection.  Perhaps God is calling you to love someone you really dislike right now.  Perhaps loving your spouse or your children or that pesky neighbor isn’t so easy to do.  But these are the people we are called to encounter with our sacrifices, sometimes hidden, but always offered as a gift of charity.

Here are ten unique ways you can show your love to someone today.

Take a fresh bouquet of flowers to a nursing home.

We so seldom consider the loneliness of those living in nursing homes and how a simple gesture of thoughtfulness is truly an act of charity.  Maybe you know someone who is in the nursing home, but you needn’t know someone personally to do this.  All it takes is a bit of cheer on your part to arrange the flowers and deliver them to the person inside the nursing home who appears to need them most.  Allow the Holy Spirit to guide you in this.  If you can, spend a few moments talking with or listening to this person.

Leave dollar bills in the candy section at your dollar store with inspirational notes attached.

This is a fun way to light up a child’s day and for no particular reason.  Kids are usually the first ones to make a beeline for the candy section at the grocery or dollar store, but wouldn’t it be an extra measure of love to attach a small note to the dollar bills you scatter, perhaps with a Scripture verse or something encouraging, like “God loves you, and so do I.  Enjoy!”  You never know how you might touch someone’s heart in such a small, but meaningful way.

Drop off freshly baked cookies to your child’s school administrators with a note of appreciation.

School and hospital workers are among the most underappreciated in our society.  They run themselves ragged, often without any sort of affirmation or thanks, so what better way to make them feel loved than to spontaneously bring them a couple dozen of your favorite homemade cookies?  The homemade touch is really special, because it demonstrates that you took the time to make them instead of purchase them on a whim.  Include a card or small note of gratitude when you drop them off to the front office.

Take your pastor out to lunch.

Our priests are so busy that they don’t often have time to stop and really enjoy a casual conversation with a friend.  Today, be a friend to your pastor and offer to take him out to lunch.  If he declines because he is too busy, then bring him lunch and spend some time visiting with him.  This is truly an act of love, because our pastors are so drained and exhausted.  A pick-me-up like this, especially unexpected, is a welcome reprieve.

Stop by your local Adoration chapel and leave holy cards in the pews.  Stay for a moment to chat with Jesus.

Many people come to visit Jesus in the Eucharistic Adoration chapels to pour out their wounds, hurts, pain, and sorrow.  Be the one to uplift the unknown adorers by visiting your local Catholic bookstore and purchasing several holy cards with saints, novena prayers, or inspirational poems on them.  Scatter them throughout the chapel and stay a few moments to spend some time expressing your love for Jesus.

Give your spouse a foot rub.

Maybe this idea strikes us as one most closely connected with Valentine’s Day, the day of love.  But you can do this anytime.  Gestures of love, especially when you are tired and worn out, mean so much more to the recipient.  Notice a time when your spouse seems especially harried and frazzled, then offer to rub his/her feet at the end of a busy day.  This gesture is akin to Jesus washing His disciples’ feet at the Last Supper.  If we truly wish to grow in charity, we must emulate Jesus all the more each day, and this is a simple way to begin doing just that.

Spontaneously make your child’s favorite dinner.  Spruce up the table with candles, a vase of fresh flowers, and your fine china.

Even if you have several children, you can alternate days when you do this.  It doesn’t have to be a one-time deal.  What makes this an act of love is that you do it thoughtfully and randomly.  It shows your children that you know them well enough and care enough about their preferences to go out of your way to do something special and unexpected.  That’s loving, especially when you add the finishing touches to make it more meaningful.  The bonus for this idea is that you get to spend dinner together as a family.  Ask about everyone’s day instead of offering tidbits about your own, too.

Offer up a day’s worth of annoyances, irritations, and frustrations as a prayer for someone you know is suffering greatly.

If you’re a Catholic, you’ve heard the expression “offer it up.”  The phrase has become clichéd, but there is usually truth behind every cliché we hear.  If we are to begin making the connection between sacrifice and authentic love, then this idea is a perfect way to wed the two into one concept.  Start by offering up – silently, as a prayer – the small and bothersome things that happen to you in one day.  You may have someone particular in mind for whom to offer up this intention.  It may seem strange or feel awkward, but if you do it once and then again, it will become a beautiful way for you to offer your own grievances as an act of love for someone else who is suffering.  God never wastes the graces of our sacrifices.

Make a “blessings bag” with various toiletries and fast-food gift cards, then hand it to a homeless person you see.  Include a card with encouraging words.

We know that one of the corporal works of mercy is feed the hungry.  All of us encounter hungry people, both literally and figuratively.  Last year during Lent, my girls and I made a “blessings bag” and filled it with all sorts of goodies: toiletries (deodorant, toothbrush and toothpaste, sample sizes of shampoo and conditioner, a bar of soap), and other little odds and ends we thought would be unique and important to someone who is struggling to make ends meet.  We included gift cards in nominal amounts for fast-food places, and we added a homemade card with a hopeful Scripture verse that my girls colored.  When we gave it away, the act itself embodied the fullness of joy when one gives in love.

Send a care package to someone in the Armed Forces serving overseas, a sick or homebound person from your family or parish, or a friend who is lonely. 

There are so many people who feel alone and forgotten in our world.  Do we think about who they might be?  Sit for a while in prayer and ask the Holy Spirit to direct you to a person who might benefit from a gesture of love, such as a care package thoughtfully crafted.  People serving overseas in our Armed Forces miss home and their families so much.  Find a non-profit organization that sends care packages, and connect with them about their most-needed items.  You might even consider “adopting” a soldier and becoming a pen-pal to him/her.  You can do this for the homebound or sick in your parish or neighborhood, too. 

The key to unlocking love in other people’s hearts is that we have to give a part of ourselves away every day.  Only when we become empty of self can Jesus fill us with Himself and thus touch other people’s lives through every small and great demonstration of charity we make each day.

How do you show love to the people aorund you? Share in the comments below!